Funny Things to Ponder

8/31/2010

Equality!! If men and women were created equal, a judge in capital crime cases would have to make sure that women were hung like men.

Don't Be A Fool, Rubberize Your Tool.

  • The Right Selection Will Protect Your Erection. 
  • She Won't Get Sick If You Wrap Your Dick.
  • No Glove, No Love! 
  • Wrap It In Foil Before Checking Her Oil. 
  • Never, Never Deck Her With An Unwrapped Pecker. 
  • When Your Undressing Venus, Dress Up Your Penis. 
  • If You Go Into Heat, Package Your Meat. 
  • If You Think She's Spunky Cover Your Monkey. 
  • Cover Your Stump Before You Hump. 
  • Don't Be Silly, Protect Your Willy. 
  • When In Doubt, Shroud Your Spout. 
  • It Will Be Sweeter If You Wrap Your Peter. 
  • You Can't Go Wrong If You Shield Your Dong. 
  • If You Slip Between Her Thighs, Be Sure To Condomize. 
  • Don't Be A Fool Cover Your Tool

 

The web isn't better than sex, but sliced bread is in serious trouble

Post

The web isn't better than sex, but sliced bread is in serious trouble
My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night it was to time an egg
If you're too lazy to start anything, you may get a reputation for patience

Now that I'm Older...

Now that I'm older, here's what I've discovered:

I started out with nothing. I still have most of it.

My wild oats have turned to prunes and All Bran.

I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart.

Funny, I don't remember being absent minded.



If all is not lost... WTH is it!http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000607148769

Why ask why?

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000607148769Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

soap bubble

Virginity is like a soapbubble, one prick and it is gone.http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000607148769

FB

My FB is down and many folks have been reporting trouble tonight.

TV vs. computer

A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.

ONE LINERS

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

ONE LINERS

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.

ONE LINERS

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.