Equality!! If men and women were created equal, a judge in capital crime cases would have to make sure that women were hung like men.

Don't Be A Fool, Rubberize Your Tool.

• The Right Selection Will Protect Your Erection. 
• She Won't Get Sick If You Wrap Your Dick.
• No Glove, No Love! 
• Wrap It In Foil Before Checking Her Oil. 
• Never, Never Deck Her With An Unwrapped Pecker. 
• When Your Undressing Venus, Dress Up Your Penis. 
• If You Go Into Heat, Package Your Meat. 
• If You Think She's Spunky Cover Your Monkey. 
• Cover Your Stump Before You Hump. 
• Don't Be Silly, Protect Your Willy. 
• When In Doubt, Shroud Your Spout. 
• It Will Be Sweeter If You Wrap Your Peter. 
• You Can't Go Wrong If You Shield Your Dong. 
• If You Slip Between Her Thighs, Be Sure To Condomize. 
• Don't Be A Fool Cover Your Tool

 

The web isn't better than sex, but sliced bread is in serious trouble

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The web isn't better than sex, but sliced bread is in serious trouble

My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night it was to time an egg

If you're too lazy to start anything, you may get a reputation for patience

Now that I'm Older...

Now that I'm older, here's what I've discovered:

I started out with nothing. I still have most of it.

My wild oats have turned to prunes and All Bran.

I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart.

Funny, I don't remember being absent minded.


If all is not lost... WTH is it!http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000607148769

Why ask why?

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000607148769Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

soap bubble

Virginity is like a soapbubble, one prick and it is gone.http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000607148769

FB

My FB is down and many folks have been reporting trouble tonight.

TV vs. computer

A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.

ONE LINERS

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

ONE LINERS

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.

ONE LINERS

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.